Terrible Jokes Thread

[mowlas]

I had a huge build up of wax in both my ears. It was a near-deaf experience.

 

[mowlas]

Taxidermists: they know their stuff

 

[mowlas]

I just watched the National Asthmatics Society's charity run. Honestly, they made it look so wheezy.

 

[happydaze]

I've decided to join the Procrastinators Society.

Some day...

 

[HenrysDad]

Proctologists. They know their s..t

 

[midlifecrisis]

Proctologists. They know their s..t

Persistant and deliberate underperformers...they know they're s**t...

 

[Andyk]

Just tickled me this one…

 

[Phil H]

I had a huge build up of wax in both my ears. It was a near-deaf experience.

There's a remedy for that:

(OK, so I spend too much time with the youngest grandson )

 

[midlifecrisis]

 

[Swedish Paul]

View attachment 103926

Yes, but then you would not have the ability to imagine.

 

[midlifecrisis]

Yes, but then you would not have the ability to imagine.

Read the sentence again, who is doing the imagining?

 

[midlifecrisis]

 

[Swedish Paul]

View attachment 103969

I’ll bet you wouldn’t tell that joke to his face….

 

[midlifecrisis]

I’ll bet you wouldn’t tell that joke to his face….

I would, but I'd be standing behind you...

 

[lifes2short]

 

[midlifecrisis]

Just been lurking on eBay, found a book that promises to resolve 50% of my problems in life....

so i bought two....

 

[HenrysDad]

So you have 25% left. What do you do with them?

 

[midlifecrisis]

So you have 25% left. What do you do with them?

I knew someone would say that..

 

[RodTungsten]

So you have 25% left. What do you do with them?

Zeno’s paradox?

 

[HenrysDad]

I knew someone would say that..

Thanks