Terrible Jokes Thread

midlifecrisis

Member
Messages
12,679
36 Years Ago Today. RIP LT.Nick Bradshaw

This is a picture of US Navy LT.Nick Bradshaw shortly before his last flight on May 13th, 1986. Lt Bradshaw was killed after he and his pilot were forced to eject from their USN Grumman F-14 Tomcat while trying to engage an adversary aircraft during a simulated combat sortie off the coast of California. The pilot was unharmed. Unfortunately LT.Nick Bradshaw did not survive the ejection. Both Lt Bradshaw and Mitchell were quickly recovered from the Pacific waters by a Coast Guard helicopter from US Coast Guard Station San Diego.

The Board of Inquiry determined that the F-14's departure from controlled flight was induced by the disruption of air flow into the starboard engine.This disruption stalled the engine, which produced enough yaw rate to induce a spin Which was unrecoverable. There was no way the pilot could see or avoid the jetwash.

The pilot's record was cleared, and was restored to flight status without further delay. Lt. Bradshaw's wife, Carole Bradshaw spoke to local media about the pilot, Lt. Peter Mitchell; "He loved flying with" him and that even though he would have hated it, "he would have flown anyway"

Blue skies and following winds LT. Bradshaw

100036
 
Messages
5,734
I needed to murder my wife but was too afraid so I engaged a hit man Arti Garfunkle.
He said he would do it for £1.00!
I agreed and scraped together the fee
My wife would be wearing a yellow coat and blue Beret as she went grocery shopping on Friday
Arti was waiting but two ladies turned up in identical outfits.
Arti panicked and decided to throttle both then left the scene.
Police picked him up later and he is now in custody
I can see the headline in tomorrows Teesside Times
Artichokes two for a pound in Tesco
 

HenrysDad

Member
Messages
140
I needed to murder my wife but was too afraid so I engaged a hit man Arti Garfunkle.
He said he would do it for £1.00!
I agreed and scraped together the fee
My wife would be wearing a yellow coat and blue Beret as she went grocery shopping on Friday
Arti was waiting but two ladies turned up in identical outfits.
Arti panicked and decided to throttle both then left the scene.
Police picked him up later and he is now in custody
I can see the headline in tomorrows Teesside Times
Artichokes two for a pound in Tesco
Absolutely in the spirit of the thread title! A truly terrible joke.