Terrible Jokes Thread

zagatoes30

zagatoes30

Member
Messages
20,940
A man is alone in an airport lounge. A beautiful woman walks
in and sits down at the table next to him.

He decides, because she's wearing a uniform, she's probably an
off-duty stewardess.

Because her jacket is folded neatly beside her he can’t see any logos so he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying
the airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly.

He leans across to her and says the British Airways motto :

'To Fly. To Serve'.

The woman looks at him blankly. He sits back and thinks up another line.

He leans forward again and delivers the Air France motto:
'Winning the hearts of the world'.

Again she just stares at him with a slightly puzzled look on
her face.

Undeterred, he tries a third time, this time saying the Malaysian
Airlines motto:

'Going beyond expectations'.

The woman looks at him sternly and says:

'What the **** do you want?'

'Ah ha!' he says,

"Ryanair".
 
mowlas

mowlas

Member
Messages
1,733
A JFK conspiracy theorist dies and goes to heaven

When he arrives at the Pearly Gates, God is there to receive him.

"Welcome. You are permitted to ask me one question, which I will answer fully."

Without hesitating, the conspiracy theorist asks, "Who really shot Kennedy?"

God replies, "Lee Harvey Oswald shot him from sixth floor of the Texas School Book Depository. There were no accomplices. He acted alone"

The conspiracy theorist pauses and goes quiet. God asks him what’s on his mind.

He replies, "Oh no, this goes higher up than I thought..."
 
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