CatmanV2
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Terrible Jokes Thread
- Thread starter Zep
- Start date
Oneball
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Fixed that for youNot funny first time
C
Zep
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Don’t worry, it’s the terrible jokes thread. Laughing or groaning (or both at the same time) are fine
For Christophes sake you would think they would wax the whole car for £75.
rs48635
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My first proper housemate "Dave" when I left home was not the brightest of our group. Only drank lager, only ate meat pies, but surprisingly skinny. He often called me at work to ask things, how does the dishwasher work, where is the hoover and stuff. Went to work early , left him eating breakfast (we only ever bought corn flakes).
Phone call 30 minutes later,
Dave; " I am really struggling with this jigsaw , can get started"
Me " what's the. picture own the box"
Dave " Big cockerel and some house stuff"
Me: " put all the cornflakes back in the box and get dressed!"
Phone call 30 minutes later,
Dave; " I am really struggling with this jigsaw , can get started"
Me " what's the. picture own the box"
Dave " Big cockerel and some house stuff"
Me: " put all the cornflakes back in the box and get dressed!"
davy83
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The birds were appauled at the old **** music and the bad jokes and left, so it was only the blue skies left
I find that in the GP surgery people often talk about things others have done but in reality it is themselves. Confess.
midlifecrisis
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An old Pilot sat down in Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee.
As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him.
She turned to the pilot and asked, ‘Are you a real pilot?’
He replied, ‘Well, I’ve spent my whole life flying Bulldogs, Jet Provosts, Hawks, Phantoms and Tornadoes during the first Gulf War and later on I taught people to fly and gave rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot – what about you?’
She said, ‘I’m a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.’
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked, ‘Are you a real pilot?’
He replied, ‘I always thought I was, but I just found out I’m a lesbian.’
As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him.
She turned to the pilot and asked, ‘Are you a real pilot?’
He replied, ‘Well, I’ve spent my whole life flying Bulldogs, Jet Provosts, Hawks, Phantoms and Tornadoes during the first Gulf War and later on I taught people to fly and gave rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot – what about you?’
She said, ‘I’m a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.’
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked, ‘Are you a real pilot?’
He replied, ‘I always thought I was, but I just found out I’m a lesbian.’
Last edited:
Gazcw
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Give em the sack for a craic.
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Zep
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Clearly you read the same stuff as Hunta
midlifecrisis
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Help me please, does the winner of Johnny Depp V Amber Heard play the winner of Colleen Rooney and Rebekkah Vardy in the final?