Terrible Jokes Thread

[CatmanV2]

Now that is a terrible joke.

Perfection!

C

 

[Flint]

Thank you gents.

 

[spkennyuk]

What style of car would a rabbit drive ?

A hutchback.

My inner geek is shouting VW Rabbit (Golf GTI this side of the pond).

Still a hutchback though.

 

[Andyk]

 

[spkennyuk]

Watching the opening ceremony for the Paris Olympics. It was in Seine !

 

[Andyk]

 

[Flint]

I always used to think that it was strange how cartoons were especially designed for, and acceptable to, children.
No bad language and absolutely no sexual content.
But, Jesus, the violence was horrendous.
Just think about Wylie E Coyote and Tom & Jerry. GBH at least 5 times a minute.

 

[DLax69]

I always used to think that it was strange how cartoons were especially designed for, and acceptable to, children.
No bad language and absolutely no sexual content.
But, Jesus, the violence was horrendous.
Just think about Wylie E Coyote and Tom & Jerry. GBH at least 5 times a minute.

Pepe LePew...?

 

[CatmanV2]

Pepe LePew...?

*Exactly* Also quite a few Bugs Bunny scenes (What's Opera, doc?, for example) where he drags up to seduce / trick Elmer Fudd.

C

 

[DLax69]

*Exactly* Also quite a few Bugs Bunny scenes (What's Opera, doc?, for example) where he drags up to seduce / trick Elmer Fudd.

C

Spear and magic helmet!

 

[CatmanV2]

Spear and magic helmet!

Spear and magic helllmmettt!

C

 

[MarkMas]

This is Coco, she's an 8-week-old Queensland Blue Heeler.

I bought her for MrsMM's birthday, but it turns out she is allergic to her, so now we are trying to find her a new home.

Can anyone take her?

She's about 60 years old, a beautiful and caring woman who can drive and cook.

 

[Flint]

 

[CatmanV2]

Bumped into one of my neighbours earlier. They had a couple of mongrel dogs with them.
I didn't know you had dogs, I said.
They're my sister's, he said.
Wow! I said. Your sisters are *ugly*

<rimshot>

C

 

[MarkMas]

Bumped into one of my neighbours earlier. They had a couple of mongrel dogs with them.
I didn't know you had dogs, I said.
They're my sister's, he said.
Wow! I said. Your sisters are *ugly*

<rimshot>

C

I don't understand this joke at all.

If he had said "They're my sisters" then your response would have been entirely legitimate,
but if he said "They're my sister's", then I don't see how you could have been confused.

 

[CatmanV2]

I don't understand this joke at all.

If he had said "They're my sisters" then your response would have been entirely legitimate,
but if he said "They're my sister's", then I don't see how you could have been confused.

Your title is safe, sir!

C

 

[zagatoes30]

Your title is safe, sir!

C

Agreed, I had to read it two or three times to see the subtle distinction

 

[Scaf]

Stood behind a chap at the cashpoint earlier today standing on one leg and wondered what he was up to, and then I realised he was just checking his balance

 

[Flint]

Stood behind a chap at the cashpoint earlier today standing on one leg and wondered what he was up to, and then I realised he was just checking his balance

My criteria for a bad joke is if I'm smiling, but I didn't want to and I'm trying not to.
This one succeeds

 

[Andyk]

There is something about these soap dispensers…not sure what it is but I just can’t put my finger on it.