Brexit Deal

M

Manc5

Member
Messages
395
Wanderer said:
But is a socialist ****-hole here, you get a state pension of €2600 a month, unemployment benefit of 80% of your salary of 450 days before it start reducing on a slow sliding scale. All public transport and city parking is free and Luxembourg city has free public wifi.

I'm telling you, it's awful.....
Click to expand...
not jealous... at all.. :0036:
 
GeoffCapes

GeoffCapes

Member
Messages
14,000
This morning it took almost an hour to get into my office because of the roadworks from the building of the new customs lorry park in Ashford.
That journey normally takes 10 minutes, tops.

I figure that with 10,000 lorries using the port every day, say 50% each way, so that's 5,000 lorries which will be using this new customs stop.
The roads in Ashford will be solid all day, every day!

Glad I'm moving out of Ashford and I will be able to get to my office via the back roads.

Another joyus bonus of Brexit. And the people of Ashford voted out. Idiots!
 
BennyD

BennyD

Sea Urchin Pate
Messages
15,006
If it f*cks up the frogs I’ll take anything we can get. The EU is imploding already so I hope we get put before the Big Bang.
 
Wanderer

Wanderer

Member
Messages
5,791
  1. The govt announced quarantine for people returning from France
  2. It waited until everyone had made travel plans, then brought the policy forwards 24 hours
  3. And then an MP using the name “Grant Shapps” helpfully told everybody the wrong date for the start of quarantine
  4. Irony’s own Bermuda Triangle, Priti Patel, said migrants were only coming here because the French are all racist and Germans torture people
  5. Days after MoD said Patel’s plans for channel protection were “completely potty”, the Navy refused to send warships into the Channel
  6. And the UN said her ideas were “very troubling” and would cause “fatal incidents”
  7. The govt proceeded with plans to end the furlough scheme, after think-tanks predicted would cost 2 million jobs
  8. Universal Credit requires £11bn extra investment to make it cope with current levels of claims, and here come another £2m
  9. So naturally, the govt made applications for Universal Credit “online only”, after removing 4000 computers from libraries and job centres since 2015
  10. The govt claimed 90% of homeless people were helped off the streets, but data actually showed rough-sleeping rose sharply
  11. So govt will scrap the ban on evictions in 5 days’ time, predicted to cause 220,000 extra people in England to become homeless just as winter starts
  12. The National Residential Landlords Association said the ban on evictions was “an unnecessary hindrance to our members”
  13. 28% of Tory MPs are landlords, and I'm going to mark that down as "an incredible coincidence" and ask no further questions
  14. News of unnecessary hindrances brings me to top fireplace salesman Gavin Williamson. He started the week modestly, with a cheery pledge to starve 175,000 children of immigrants, by stopping their free meals while their families cannot legally work or claim benefits
  15. All the way back in the mists of time (in May) the govt instructed Ofqual to tell teachers to spend hours per-pupil creating estimated grades, which were reviewed and approved by headteachers
  16. But then toothsome mantis Gavin Williamson decided teachers know less than quickly-written and badly-tested software does, and commissioned an algorithm to invent grades for this year's students, based largely on totally different students from different years
  17. The Royal Statistical Society (RSS) offered to help assess the outcome of the algorithm after staff at Dept for Education raised concerns. But the govt put barriers in the way which would prevent the RSS from operating properly for 5 years. So they couldn't help.
  18. Gavin Williamson is on record instructing Ofqual to design a system that could not allow grade inflation
  19. But this week, in a wildly unpredictable turn of events, he blamed Ofqual for - brace yourself - designing a system that did not allow grade inflation
  20. But private schools did get grade inflation, an average 8x the increase state schools got
  21. On average, 40% of state schools results were downgraded, and in Northern England it was as high as 84%
  22. In some subjects, 98.9% of results from private schools were inflated
  23. The Times reports the govt still plans to use the algorithm for GCSE’s, but will not downgrade any results, only upgrade them: which only benefits private schools
  24. And then a maelstrom of policy changes began: first, students were barred from appealing against results
  25. Then they were permitted to appeal results, at a cost of £113 per exam
  26. Then it was announced schools would pay the fees, even though schools are not only closed, but broke, having had £7bn cut from their budget by Tories
  27. And then it was announced the appeals would be free, even though Ofqual has no facilities to handle that number of appeals
  28. And then they cancelled the appeals program completely
  29. All that appeals stuff happened in just 48 hours
  30. When Scotland used the algorithm, it led to a crisis and had to be abandoned, and Tories called for the Scottish Education Minister to resign
  31. Regardless, the UK govt implemented the algorithm that had just been proven to fail, and seemed surprised when it failed
  32. The Minister of Innovation said A-Levels don’t matter as much as “grit and determination”, and his failure at Harrow “taught me how to hustle”. He is the 5th Lord Bethan, and “hustled” his way to a hereditary peerage as a result of his Dad dying. Good hustling, dude!
  33. Gavin Williamson said there would be “No U-turn, no change”, which I think he got from a sign outside a toll-booth on the M6
  34. Boris Johnson said, “be in no doubt about it, the exam results that we've got today are robust, they're good, they're dependable for employers”
  35. The Daily Mail – yes, even them – reported the govt only changed its mind after the headmaster of Eton – yes, even them – complained about the unfairness
  36. The UK Equalities Watchdog warned it would intervene because the algorithm results were discriminatory
  37. Gavin Williamson claimed he only spotted the flaws “at the weekend”, but hours later it was revealed the Commons Education Dept warned him of all these flaws and dangers, in person, and then in a report sent to him on 10th July
  38. On the steps of Downing St the day he became PM, Johnson said “My job is to make sure your kids get a superb education, wherever you are from. I will take personal responsibility. The buck stops here”.
  39. Boris Johnson is busy “glamping”, so in his absence it was decided the buck stops at the head of Ofqual, who simply followed ministerial instructions; and at Gavin Williamson’s permanent secretary, who was unceremoniously sacked for doing what his boss told him
  40. Meanwhile, Williamson felt the best use of his time was to pose for a photo with little on his desk but a cup, a seemingly empty file, and a whip (for reasons that bewilder, but are in keeping with his apparent background as a mildly disturbing minor Addams Family character)
  41. Winston Churchill’s grandson, a Tory MP, said of Gavin Williamson “what could have been in the Prime Minister’s mind that led him to appoint so mere, so unreliable, so wholly unsuitable a man to one of the most important jobs in Government”
  42. A Tory MP said “It was as clear as day that there would be an issue, given what happened in Scotland, yet they ****** around”
  43. A poetic Tory MP said the govt was “******* into the void”, and if that’s not the name of a band by midnight, what’s the point of anything?
  44. There are now calls for Ofqual to be abolished and replaced with something that will probably be worse, but as yet no news on which unqualified but vaguely aristocratic Tory MP’s wife will run it. I'll keep you posted.
  45. Meanwhile, Gavin Williamson had promised to provide laptops to disadvantaged students during the lockdown, but only half the required laptops were delivered, and 27 Academy Trusts got just 1 laptop each, to be shared between over 2000 students
  46. After the stunning success of this bit of Artificial Intelligence, the govt announced plans to boost Whitehall AI spending by £200m. The money will go to Faculty AI, which has links to [checks notes] a Mr Dominic Cummings, resident of Whitehall and Specsavers in Durham
  47. Rumours that the govt has an algorithm that turns every minister into Chris Grayling are unfounded
  48. Chris Grayling – I mean, Gavin Williamson - now has to persuade parents that he’s competent enough to make schools safe for their kids to return. Good luck with that, Gav.
  49. The govt had 5 months to plan and execute one exam policy affecting 335,000 students
  50. The govt now has 4 months to plan and execute over 2000 Brexit policies affecting 67 million of us, and every business in the country. Brace, brace.
 
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