Terrible Jokes Thread

[midlifecrisis]

There was a Spanish bloke at work today and I kept on saying Mucho...

A colleague asked me why, I said 'it means a lot to him'

 

[Flint]

Just got back from my mate's funeral. He died after being hit on the head with a tennis ball.
It was a lovely service.

 

[James3200GTA]

Just got back from my mate's funeral. He died after being hit on the head with a tennis ball.
It was a lovely service.

The mods should really add a rolling eyes or similar emoji under the reaction possiblity. For this thread only as it's reaching new levels every day. Deep or high is for the L.S. to decide.

 

[Phil H]

Nuff?

 

[James3200GTA]

Not there, in the like section...

 

[MarkMas]

The mods should really add a rolling eyes or similar emoji under the reaction possiblity. For this thread only as it's reaching new levels every day. Deep or high is for the L.S. to decide.

Sometimes I just want to use ALL of them.

 

[philw696]

 

[happydaze]

What does "illiterate" mean?

 

[midlifecrisis]

View attachment 153128

Some post comments are pure comedy ...
Here's one, a Man City Season Ticket holder thinks he was entitled to buy Oasis Tickets ahead of anyone else. Read the second comment...

 

[midlifecrisis]

I should put these in the football thread but it's too funny.

 

[Flint]

What does "illiterate" mean?

I find that comment quite patronising.
You do know what that means don't you ?

 

[MaserMM]

 

[MarkMas]

I should put these in the football thread but it's too funny.
View attachment 153134

 

[CatmanV2]

I don’t normally like to flaunt my lifestyle or brag about going to expensive places…
but I just left the petrol station.
Very exclusive.
Very expensive.
Basically VIP pricing with no champagne.
No pictures, please. I’m trying to stay humble during this financially traumatic time.

C

 

[philw696]

I don’t normally like to flaunt my lifestyle or brag about going to expensive places…
but I just left the petrol station.
Very exclusive.
Very expensive.
Basically VIP pricing with no champagne.
No pictures, please. I’m trying to stay humble during this financially traumatic time.

C

I know that feeling over here at the moment Chris.

 

[philw696]

 

[joered]

I have just come back from Italy and the dearest price for petrol was at a BP station on the M40 at £2.50 a Ltr i think BP are having a laugh

 

[Scaf]

What does the surgeon say to someone who can’t pay for gender realignment?

“Trans action denied “ boom boom !

 

[dem maser]

The mods should really add a rolling eyes or similar emoji under the reaction possiblity. For this thread only as it's reaching new levels every day. Deep or high is for the L.S. to decide.

I’ll see what I can do

 

[midlifecrisis]

What does the surgeon say to someone who can’t pay for gender realignment?

“Trans action denied “ boom boom !

Whilst doing the nip and tuck, they also do the public hair op...Trans Fur..