Terrible Jokes Thread

[Tallman]

 

[happydaze]

I've decided to name my new boat Unsinkable II.

If you had a lisp, that would be Unthinkable...

 

[Nibby]

 

[CatmanV2]

C

 

[MarkMas]

 

[philw696]

We'll see what happens but don't think I'll be popping down to Le Mans in a Tesla with a load of $$$

 

[CatmanV2]

Just had Christmas dinner…
If I'm honest, I am Not a great fan of slow cookers .

C

 

[Flint]

 

[philw696]

 

[MarkMas]

I've only been working at the bicycle factory for a week, and they've already made me their chief spokes man.

 

[CatmanV2]

C

 

[Flint]

 

[trevorrevver]

Truly terrible.

 

[zagatoes30]

The Devon / Cornwall 60s / 70s music festival has had to be cancelled, they couldn't agree if The Jam or Cream should go on first

 

[Flint]

Truly terrible.

We aim to please

 

[CatmanV2]

Please help. I’m going to an event tonight and the invitation says “dress to kill”. I’m not quite sure what that means. So far the only thing that comes to mind is to take wellies, PPE, and bin bags, and then burn them all afterwards.

C

 

[MarkMas]

Top tip #142

Avoid being bothered by wasps at BBQs this summer by putting a blob of jam on a small child

 

[DLax69]

 

[CatmanV2]

I'm sorry. (and even sorrier if it's a repeat)

C