School Fees - what we will do as parents for kids !

slay

Member
Messages
409
This does hurts ! Knowing that my outgoing expense on kids education will go up to 40K a year just on school fees alone !

This is enough to buy a decent Maserati GT every year for the next 6 years !

I have never been to a private school myself, in fact probably one of the worst state school in Australia. Things we do as parents for our kids !

I am just hoping that I will not need to sell my Stradale to pay the school fees one day, or maybe I will be so lucky that the car may one day cover all the kids education costs.
 

outrun

Member
Messages
5,017
Move to Scotland where all you to do is buy a house in the catchment for the best state schools and that's you sorted. A top 10 school will push the house price up but for £40k a year you can support a £750k mortgage so you'd at least be paying down an appreciating asset.

:)
 

Ebenezer

Member
Messages
4,442
Happily that expense is now in the past for me. However, while we seemed to be able to find the money for the fees, it just doesn't seem to be there for cars... Can't quite figure out what happened! Woman maths is more powerful than Man maths perhaps. Like you say, could buy a relatively recent supercar every 3 years. However, just concerned about how to fund the maintenance of an aging depreciating asset which isn't worth much in the first place!
Eb
 

2b1ask1

Special case
Messages
20,220
I feel your pain, My eldest won a scholarship place at Christ's Hospital, Horsham and it very nearly bankrupted us with everything else and the other four! Fortunately my youngest is now 18 and hopefully will be looking at an apprenticeship in banking/insurance as an actuary! If not I'll still have another lot of uni fees to find!!!
 

bigbob

Member
Messages
8,952
Easy to see both sides to this question and there will be lots of personal experiences claiming the benefits of either option. Thing is you need to do what is right for your family and that depends on where you live and what your children are like.

Bright kids can do well at any school but some schools can bring out the best in kids who might otherwise drift and some schools offer strong extra curricular programmes that help turn out well sorted and engaging young people - this is measured not just in exam performance and higher education destinations but also whether they can hold a conversation with an adult. Without this high achieving academic performance means nothing as they won’t ultimately hold down a decent job. Personally I pay for my kids education and feel I get value money from it. Doesn’t mean it’s right for you though!
 

slay

Member
Messages
409
Hindsight is always a wonderful thing, of course, there are plenty of brights kids educated by the state school and subsequently got into Oxbridge and ended up doing very very well indeed. I am sure that there are also those who would have benefited from a (dare I say) better private school system (but simply because they have more resources and better facilities). I will be more than happy for pay for state schools (say 30% of private) if the state education system stops focusing on cuts and saving but focus on providing the best education system itself.

As Eb highlighted above - Woman maths is more powerful than man maths, I am sure what response I will get suggesting spending 40K on a car every year!

Also, at least now I do not feel guilty having just bought a Stradale to indulge myself. It will be difficult to convince myself that I have done the right thing saving money on kids education in order to fund my expensive hobby.

I just hope that this commitment to private school education will make a significant enough difference to their future.
 

Keano

Member
Messages
287
Its a choice and one i have not regretted though it sure hurts with 3 of them. All have got much more from it than the academic value but there a are some who go and don't get the full value/experience by not taking part in the sports, drama and other such electives.
 

slay

Member
Messages
409
Most importantly, private school is not just about sending kids to oxbridge in my opinion. It is about developing the "soft skills" - all the personal development that falls outside the academic achievement. Given the cost pressure, I doubt any of the state school could focus investments on the "non-core" subjects.

Yes, a good degree from a good university will certainly help opening that first door - if they actually want to for a big corporation, but it is the other soft skills that would determine how successful they will be. I have seen many high achievers academically ended up being very very average in the big corporation environment - lack of interpersonal and other soft skills will almost certainly limit career progression in big corporation such as in finance.

Maybe they will end up running their own business which does not even need a university degree, so I just hope the private school system does help them to prepare whichever path they will end up taking.
 

slay

Member
Messages
409
Its a choice and one i have not regretted though it sure hurts with 3 of them. All have got much more from it than the academic value but there a are some who go and don't get the full value/experience by not taking part in the sports, drama and other such electives.
I have certainly asked my son (soon my daughter) to participate in all the extra curriculum activities that the school has to offer - maximise my ROI.
 

outrun

Member
Messages
5,017
Most importantly, private school is not just about sending kids to oxbridge in my opinion. It is about developing the "soft skills" - all the personal development that falls outside the academic achievement. Given the cost pressure, I doubt any of the state school could focus investments on the "non-core" subjects.

Yes, a good degree from a good university will certainly help opening that first door - if they actually want to for a big corporation, but it is the other soft skills that would determine how successful they will be. I have seen many high achievers academically ended up being very very average in the big corporation environment - lack of interpersonal and other soft skills will almost certainly limit career progression in big corporation such as in finance.

Maybe they will end up running their own business which does not even need a university degree, so I just hope the private school system does help them to prepare whichever path they will end up taking.

Interesting as for this exact reason that we have chosen a good state school for our kids over private. I went to a very established (1640!) private school and felt that I struggled academically at first as I didn't have any life skills outside of the sheltered school environment. It took me a couple of tough years a uni to adapt to not being spoon fed in such a way as to produce results. My school is consistently in the top 5 across all of Scotland for final exam results and boasts some mega alumni but I always felt that as a business, it's product is academic results and that is measured by how many kids get into which further education establishment. It wasn't at all focussed on anything outside of that mandate.

Now I know that every case is different, all schools differ and so on but i can't help but think that a good state school offers a better balance of academic vs. life skills. As I said, that's my experience of the West of Scotland only and our school system is somewhat different to England etc.
 

GeoffCapes

Member
Messages
14,000
I will have this to contend with shortly.

I went to a state school, didn't do A levels or a degree now own my own businesses.
My wife went to private school from the age of 5, did A levels went to Uni.

As a happy medium, we have said if the money is there, we will pay for private schooling (so Alex put Josephs name down for one).
However, when Joseph goes to Primary school, the village school near us are rated Outstanding by Ofsted, so what is the point of private schools at that age?

The only problem is, we don't live in the catchment area for a village school, so we will have to move. Not a problem, but it just adds to the financial outlay.
And means I have to work harder!

Kids eh? who'd have em?
 

slay

Member
Messages
409
I will have this to contend with shortly.

I went to a state school, didn't do A levels or a degree now own my own businesses.
My wife went to private school from the age of 5, did A levels went to Uni.

As a happy medium, we have said if the money is there, we will pay for private schooling (so Alex put Josephs name down for one).
However, when Joseph goes to Primary school, the village school near us are rated Outstanding by Ofsted, so what is the point of private schools at that age?

The only problem is, we don't live in the catchment area for a village school, so we will have to move. Not a problem, but it just adds to the financial outlay.
And means I have to work harder!

Kids eh? who'd have em?

Exactly - we had to pay for nursery for a few years, and enjoy the "relief" while the kids attended primary school (I don't see the point of sending them private at such young age), now we just need to suck it in for the next 7 years. Well, at least there will be no regret as I have absolutely done my best to pay their education. They could join the rest of uni students for a student loan when they go to universities.
 

safrane

Member
Messages
16,746
£40k would pay for a lot of extra after school tutorial without the need for the full blown school.

The GF went to Wellington College and eventually became a Dr and then a Consultant. She looks back and feels she would have preferred to have had a normal education and been a teacher... her family pushed her to achieve in everything and made her childhood a miserable time... its no guarantee of happiness... so listen to them too.
 

Needamaser

Member
Messages
1,491
Interesting as for this exact reason that we have chosen a good state school for our kids over private. I went to a very established (1640!) private school and felt that I struggled academically at first as I didn't have any life skills outside of the sheltered school environment. It took me a couple of tough years a uni to adapt to not being spoon fed in such a way as to produce results. My school is consistently in the top 5 across all of Scotland for final exam results and boasts some mega alumni but I always felt that as a business, it's product is academic results and that is measured by how many kids get into which further education establishment. It wasn't at all focussed on anything outside of that mandate.

Now I know that every case is different, all schools differ and so on but i can't help but think that a good state school offers a better balance of academic vs. life skills. As I said, that's my experience of the West of Scotland only and our school system is somewhat different to England etc.
I am guessing we both went to the same school. ;-)
And yes number of bodies that went to Uni was the key. I needed the push the school gave to get results but like you out of their doors it was a shock to the system.
 

Ewan

Member
Messages
6,756
Very much a personal choice issue this one. But on the academic front, it's no secret that the top private schools send a disproportionately high percentage of their pupils to Oxbridge and the Russel Group Universities.

But it's not just about the academics. The soft skills matter. As does the confidence. Plus who you meet, the old-boy/girl network, the introductions, etc. You have to look at the full picture over the long term, and then decide whether its something you want to commit the money to or not.

All that said, most importantly, the school has to be right for the child (and vice versa). Push a child into the "wrong" school, and it'll all end in tears irrespective of whether you've paid for it or not.