Glass hammer, long stand and the fabled tartan paint, 6 ft of fallopian tubing, bag of sparks for a welder, left handed adjustable metric wrench.
All old and heard many times now. Perhaps we should start some next generation ones of them here.
1. Bags for a dyson vacuum cleaner
2. New lead for an LED light bulb.
3. Forum anchor to stop a thread drifting.
4. A long life Alfa suspension bush.
5. A no quibble warranty that Maserati honour !
Yes i know. No one would fall for number 5
Customer service prank calls i have seen over the years working in logistics. Somebody phoning Iraqi airlines in 1990 to make a booking to Kuwait.
Funny and genuine conversation. I wont name the airline but i used to ship human remains by air 3 or 4 times a month. When you make a booking you need to give the airline the actual weight and dimensions of the shipment. The problem with human remains shipments is the weight and dims vary alot so its a guess to make the booking and you then update the details when the coffin arrives at depot. I obviously got the trainee this particular day. Making the booking became hard work but im pretty patient with the trainees.
Me to airline: ive got a human remains booking for you.
Airline: pieces and weight ?
Me: ? Erm its 1 piece estimate 150 kgs for now and i will call you back and confirm the actual weight as soon as it comes into us.
Airline. Ok but i need the actual weight. Can i have the dimensions ?
Me: estimate them at 200 x 70 x 50 cms and i will ring you with the actual dims when it arrives with me.
Airline: i need the actual dims otherwise i cant put the booking through.
Me: you dont. Ask one of your colleagues i book these every week with you. Why do you need the dimensions now when your colleagues just need an estimate until the body arrives with me.
Airline: i need to put the dimensions in so i can work out if it charged on the actual weight or the volume weight.
Me: Can you please speak to one of your colleagues they know how to do these booking.
I can assure you its definately DEAD weight !!
Airline: can i put you on hold while i check with my colleague.
Me: sure no problem.
Airline: ive checked with my colleague amd they have said its DEAD weight too. So i can take the booking.
Me: Thanks very much. I will call you later with the confirmed weight and dims.
I was trying not to laugh by the end of the call.